Are You Running From Your Calling?

 In the Bible, there were a few people who thought they were unworthy to fulfill the purpose that God gave them while others acted out of sheer disobedience. They wanted to anything else but what God called them to do. 

As you look on social media today, you see a lot of people who have titles in front of their name; some of them were called and chosen while others "self-appointed" themselves to what they chose or though they were. 

Many people want titles for popularity and selfish gain while the ones who were called and chosen have no desire for a title at all. 

Many people want to be a prophet, but they don't want to be purged, refined nor have a heart for the people. The uncalled have a selfish agenda and that is not the way that the gift of prophecy is to be used or how a prophet should conduct themselves. 

I know someone very close to me who was prophesied that she was called to be a Deborah at the ripe age of 13. She had no idea as to who that was at first and at a glance, she looked at the name in the Bible, but didn't pay it much attention. She was a kid so what did she know about pursuing a calling like that.

Yes, in 1 Samuel, prophet Samuel was called at a young age, but her mindset was a bit different. 

As she grew older and went about her life, she had gone on a journey which involved meaningless relationships, having kids and lived a full life in a backslidden state. 

At the age of 16, she went to Job Corps and a few boyfriends and one she was with from October 1997 to June 2023. During the time of that relationship, she was abused mentally and physically. She tried to hold onto the relationship due to not having her own two parents in the same home and she wanted that for her children. She held on as much as she could in spite of infidelity and abuse, but she finally let go in 2022. She had to move because of her ex, but was glad to move because he was still abusive to her, one time physically and verbally on a regular basis. Thank God for the dial tone.

Moving on from him with three children, she entered a few relationships and dated here and there. She got into trouble and made messes, but by the grace of God, she got out of them. 

At the age of 28, she got baptized at church and her client at the time was the co-pastor due to his son taking over due to being seasoned in age (elderly). During her baptism, he gave the name Deborah again. Well, reflecting back to 1993, she knew exactly as to who Deborah was and it states in the Bible she was a prophetess and a judge. After hearing that prophetic word again, she went back into the world and back into carnality. She was dressed in white and decided to not adhere to the calling and go her own way. She just dwelled in sin and in fornication. 

Along that journey, she dealt with a relationship that could have ended in marriage, but the man had a lustful and lying spirit. She decided not to go through it. She dated another man who was sweet and nice, but she didn't trust him fully so she didn't marry him either. 

She met one guy who was living a double life, separated from his wife and not known to her. She didn't believe in adultery or anything like that due to the Bible. Someone actually told her it was okay years ago to date someone if they were separated and that was not biblically correct. She still found it to be unacceptable and the man not being forthcoming was not helpful. God told her to cut the relationship off, but she enjoyed his company and declined warning. 

Suddenly the man started being funny with her and eventually they parted ways. She was heartbroken, but had she listened, she would have been spared and she hurt her own self due to disobedience and not guarding her heart.

Proverbs 4:23 Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.

At the age of 33, she found herself crying out to God in her living room, positioned up like a baby and repenting. She had to deal with pain and started a purging process, and it hurt. The next relationship (long distance) was great, but it hurt as well, but that was a long story behind that one...

She was practically thrown into ministry, ministering and encouraging other women and some men in their singleness when she was still hurting and tending to her own wounds. 

As she helped others, she healed from the things she dealt with and actually took another vow of abstinence and fully bowed to God. 

Now back to being a prophet. Now she still didn't want to truly accept that calling because she knew what came with it and she never called herself a name or prophet (or prophetess), but others did and she never told anyone who God prophesied through to her about it. 

She was invited to a conference call and the lady asked her what they should call her and she stated only her name and that was it. She went and released what God gave her to give. After the call was at the end, they asked if she wanted a seed and she declined. 

Over the years she accepted (in a way of who she was) what God placed in her life as a calling, but it came with much warfare, especially persecution from Jezebel and that is the main part that she hates. Since she has accepted who God created her to be and to do, she is more at peace with herself.

Don't run from your calling and back to sin. Do what God has called you to do!